An analysis of a forgotten poem
Because I liked you better
Than suits a man to say,
It irked you, and I promised
To throw the thought away.
To put the world between us
We parted, stiff and dry;
‘Goodbye,’ said you, ‘forget me.’
‘I will, no fear’, said I.
If here, where clover whitens
The dead man’s knoll, you pass,
And no tall flower to meet you
Starts in the trefoiled grass,
Halt by the headstone naming
The heart no longer stirred,
And say the lad that loved you
Was one that kept his word.
Alfred Edward Housman was an English classical scholar and poet. After his initial underwhelming performance in college, he accepted a job as a clerk in London and started out by publishing as a private scholar to build his academic profile. Subsequently, the University College London and the University of Cambridge both hired Housman as their Latin professor. He is currently regarded as one of the best classicists of all time and has been named one of the greatest scholars ever.
His most popular works include A Shropshire Lad and De Amicitia. However, today I will not be focusing on either of those. The poem above is called Because I Liked You Better and is one of the least regarded works of Housman. But why? You see, Housman didn’t publish this poem in his lifetime, and a detailed look at the poem may just explain why. Let’s go back to the start of the poem.
“Because I liked you better
Than suits a man to say”
Although the references throughout the poem are plenty, it becomes very clear in this line to many that Housman here is hinting at his homosexuality.
See Housman was born during Victorian times when attitudes and expectations around marriage and sexual relationships were quite rigid. Heterosexuality was regarded as natural and normal, while sexual behavior and gender expression that fell outside these bounds were classified as deviant.
If Housman’s poems do indeed allude to a queer love, which was not publicly discussed during his lifetime, then it is because his poetry was inspired by the hopeless love he harbored for another man.
This poem, like almost all of Housman’s poetry (with the possible exception of his nonsensical verse, ‘The Crocodile’), was motivated by the poet’s own hopeless love for Moses Jackson, an athlete he met while they were both students at Oxford in the late 1870s and early 1880s.
Jackson later got married and moved to Canada, but Housman stayed true to him and cherished their improbable love right up to Jackson’s passing in 1923.
After then, Housman sadly stopped writing poetry because his one true muse had left him, in a cold, bitter bubble of rejection.
‘Because I liked you better’ was not released during the lifetime of A. E. Housman because the first few lines suggest a love that is afraid to reveal its name. However, it did appear in More Poems, which was released soon after his passing in 1936 and featured it with another poem by Housman in which he bids Jackson farewell, while also realizing that the love he longs for to be reciprocated would never be.
The poem is categorized into four stanzas, with every second line rhyming
This framework, which is constrictive, stiff, and very structured, replicates the constraints on homosexuality imposed by Victorian society. Because of the attitude the Victorians had toward homosexuality, the poet’s love was basically forbidden. It was outlawed by Housman’s surroundings as well as by Moses, who was “irked” and rejected the hopeless romantic’s love.
Although the rhyme scheme’s song like pattern proposes that love is simple, this juxtaposes the complexity of the relationship and the complexity of his emotions towards his unrequited love.
“To put the world between us / we parted stiff and dry”
Housman agrees to let separation — in the shape of “the world” — come between him and his lover, suggesting that events in the outside world, including time and society’s perception of homosexuality, have divided the two. Additionally, he argues that time and the death that only time can bring will mark the final act of separation between him and his Moses.
“And say the lad that loved you/ was one that kept his word”
The poem is written in the first person, much like a letter Housman would write to Moses. He closes the poem with imagery of death, which would mark their last separation.
“Was one who kept his word”,
Refers to how Housman believes he will always follow his vow of
“Throwing the thought [of liking Moses] away,” (ironic because in writing this poem he shows how he has clearly not thrown the thought of liking him away).
Housman tragically perceives that his lover would never fully understand the extent of his affection. He conceives that Moses through the final line,
“Was one who kept his word,”
believes that Housman has truly
“Thrown the thought away.”
When in reality he still thinks quite deeply about Moses.
As a result, the poet expresses some frustration that the misunderstandings have existed between him and his lover while they were still alive and will continue even after death has separated them.
The use of “love” in the poem’s conclusion rather than “liked” at the beginning demonstrates that, despite the fact that death would ultimately cause the two to be permanently separated, it does provide Housman with the opportunity to freely declare his affection for Moses as he is free from societies shackles.
“If here, where the clover whitens/ The dead man’s knoll, you pass”
“Whitening clover” and the color white evoke images of snow, ice, and wintry landscapes, making one feel chilly and numb. This could allude to how separation has the same numbing effect on the love Housman feels for Moses, and could also be a reference to how death will numb and destroy all the little possibilities they have of love and a relationship.
Additionally, the flower references (such as “clover” and “no tall flower to meet you”) imply that Housman and Moses’s relationship hasn’t yet reached its full potential. The presence of only common weeds and no actual cultivated flora at his imagined grave symbolizes that their relationship was unsuccessful and, as a result, lacked any genuine beauty. There is only “clover” and “no tall flower” there.
“Halt by the headstone naming/ The heart no longer stirred”
The “halt”, “headstone”, and “heart” have short, plosive sounds conveying the poet’s disdain for the resistance in the former relationship. Additionally, the sounds stutter, which may be a metaphor for how their relationship struggled, failed, and eventually faded.
The heart, which is necessary for life, is said to be “no longer stirred.” This refers to the ultimate release from an unrequited love that Housman believes he might receive from death, conjuring a gloomy, hopeless image.
Housman may never have gotten the chance to love Moses in his lifetime, but this poem immortalized the conflict that might have stolen sleep from many of his nights. Although mostly forgotten, the sting behind each stanza bring life to Housman’s suffering. He believed his love would perish with him, yet here we are experiencing it once more, perhaps his love remains more intact than he could have ever imagined. Thriving through his poetry, calling for Moses till the end of times.
